I am going through a major heart break. I am emotionally involved with a married man. we have known each?

other for some time now. I KEPT DISTANT for about two years. i couldnt handle not being in touch with him . now we started texting each other and i think when he needs TO USE ME ( for he benefits ) our texing is ually orientated thats how he speaks to me, he doesnt text me for some time. I am obssesed with the phone checking if he has text me or not. yesterday i spent two hourse with him , and couldnt resist not to text him today. what i can see from his texts he was busy or not bothered coz the texts seemed very flat and borring, which is very unusual compared to how he is ? What message is he giving me ?? am also jelaous if he has another girl